“I’m sorry for hurting you.”
“I’m sorry for not taking my commitment seriously.”
“I’m sorry for being late.”
“I’m sorry for lying to you.”
“I’m sorry.”
Arguably the most powerful grouping of words a human being can say is “I’m sorry.” In a world full of mistakes, it’s even more important to own them. From the beginning of our existence, instead of looking in a mirror and apologizing for a wrong we’ve done, we usually go for the jugular and shift the blame somewhere else. The man said, “The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate.” (Genesis 3:12)
“It’s her fault. And it’s your fault for putting this sinful person in my midst.”
Our excuses for being unapologetic are rooted in a pride that is inhumane. What I mean by this is that, by not owning our mistakes, we attempt to be more than human. We strive to be untouchable and only a victim of our environment. However, we don’t only contribute to our environment; we created it. Adam’s sin paved the way for every generation to turn a blind eye to God and one another, all for the sake of self-preservation. Instead of being more than human, we have become much less.
The most human thing we can do is to say “I’m sorry.”
A true apology is powerful and says several things. It says:
- I recognize my mistake
- I accept responsibility for my actions
- I care about your feelings
- I need forgiveness
“I was wrong” is not something many of us are used to saying, but I believe that if we can come to terms with our humanity– the fact that we screw things up regularly and are an unfinished product–we will become more of what we already are. Human.
God already knows we are 100% human. He knows our mistakes and pride and inability to accept ownership when we hurt our friends and neighbors and our unwillingness to repent of our sin. But through God sacrificing His perfect son Jesus–who committed no wrong against the worst people, you and I–on a bloody cross, he offers forgiveness of a lifetime of sin.
Therefore, we can apologize. More importantly, we can apologize without any rebuttal of “but.” You can own your shortcomings because Christ’s sacrifice means that you (1) recognize your humanity and need for grace, (2) you recognize Christ is truly human and truly God, so he can be all that you are not and justifies you as mistake-free before God, and (3) through this good news you won’t be separated from God for your mistake, big or small. This frees us to say sorry. Own it and position yourself under the grace of God, the most amazing gift we have ever received from the best Giver.
This is hard to accept without the Holy Spirit. The Spirit reminds us of our humanity and dependence through extinguishing the flame of our pride and softening the hardness of our hearts. He reminds us that God is reversing the curse that happened in the garden through Adam sin and pride. In fact, God is making all things new! There both is hope for the perpetrator who made the mistake and the soul that is finding it hard to accept the apology and forgive them.
Let’s walk in the Spirit, in these human bodies, in humility knowing that we are loved the same even when we make mistakes. Apologize more.
mitchjay 